


Denial of the Soul

by sharkie335



Category: Stargate Atlantis
Genre: M/M, Two beer queer
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2010-01-05
Updated: 2010-01-05
Packaged: 2017-10-05 20:18:35
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 3,423
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/45676
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/sharkie335/pseuds/sharkie335
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>"Just go to bed, Colonel.  You're going to be hung over as hell in the morning."</p>
            </blockquote>





	Denial of the Soul

Rodney dragged Sheppard back to their room. He was propped over Rodney's shoulder, and mumbling to himself as Rodney tried not to drop him. "Come along, Colonel. It's bedtime for all drunk flyboys."

"'M not drunk," Sheppard slurred, and attempted to get loose from Rodney's grip. He hadn't gone more than a step or two when he started to sway, and Rodney ducked forward to hold him up again.

"Right. Not drunk. That would be easier to believe if you weren't hanging on me like a cheap coat." He adjusted his grip on Sheppard's arm, draping it over his shoulder, and continued the march towards their assigned quarters, where they'd left their outerwear and weapons earlier. The Hideaki were renowned for their hospitality, and this wasn't the Atlanteans' first visit. They'd felt safe enough without the TAC vests and guns, though Rodney didn't doubt that Ronon still had his hair knives.

Sheppard's free hand came up and tweaked one of Rodney's nipples just as they reached the door to the bedroom. Rodney was so startled he nearly dropped him. "What the hell, Sheppard? Hands to yourself!"

With a mournful look, Sheppard dropped his hand. "Sorry, Rodney."

Sighing, Rodney adjusted his hold again and opened the door, helping Sheppard into the room. "It's okay. Just no touchy-feely stuff, right?" He didn't think that would be a real problem, because Sheppard usually had a real aversion to being touched. Sheppard nodded, and Rodney breathed a sigh of relief as he walked him over to one of the beds.

As he dropped Sheppard on to the soft surface, he reached out and caught Rodney's shoulder, pulling him down as well. "Whoa!"

But this time, Sheppard seemed determined, tugging at his shirt. "C'mon, Rodney, lemme see them."

Fighting off Sheppard was harder than it should have been - apparently a drunk Sheppard had an octopus for arms. "What in the world has gotten into you, Sheppard?" He managed to yank his shirt back down, but he wasn't able to keep it there, as Sheppard had gotten his hands underneath and was shoving it up.

"I want to see your nipples. They're always teasing me - only fair that I return the favor." With that, Sheppard managed to flip them over, so he was straddling Rodney's hips, and shoved his shirt all the way up. He pursed his lips, and then grinned. While he continued to pin Rodney by one shoulder, the other hand was drifting down, brushing through Rodney's chest hair to finger one nipple, which immediately stood up under the attention.

Rodney bit his lip and closed his eyes, trying to focus as Sheppard continued to touch. When he thought that he had himself under control again, he took a deep breath and flipped them back over, pinning Sheppard's hands to the bed. "That's enough."

"Oh, come on, Rodney," Sheppard whined.

"You're drunk, Colonel," Rodney said flatly. "We are not doing this when you're drunk. Come see me when you're sober and we'll talk about it."

"You're only saying that because you think I won't remember."

Standing up from the bed, Rodney shook his head. He thought to himself that he'd not realized that Sheppard was a two beer queer, but he really shouldn't have been surprised. "No, I'm saying this because I don't think you'd _want_ this sober." Rodney turned his back to Sheppard and closed his eyes. Unfair. This was really unfair when all he wanted was to be touched by Sheppard, and _now_ he did it, when he was soused out of his mind.

There was a whisper of sound, and then Sheppard's hand was on his back, turning him around. "Rodney?"

"Just go to bed, Colonel. You're going to be hung over as hell in the morning." Rodney shook his hand free, but Sheppard just stood there, wavering slightly on his feet and staring - rather foggily - at him. Rodney had almost decided to just leave him standing there, when Sheppard finally moved, taking him by one arm and dragging him in the direction of the bed. "I said no."

"I know that, Rodney. I just - I don't want to sleep alone tonight. At least sleep with me?" Rodney blinked, feeling as confused as Sheppard looked. Then he sighed. He'd never been able to say no to Sheppard. Reluctantly, he started to undo his boots. Sheppard watched him for a moment, then turned away and started to undo his own.

In silence, they stripped down to boxers and t-shirts, and then climbed into the bed. At least it was large enough that they didn't have to touch, Rodney thought to himself, only to wish he could smack himself when Sheppard rolled up against him, slinging one arm over his chest and settling into sleep almost immediately, snoring lightly.

Rodney didn't know how long he lay awake, staring at the ceiling. Eventually, Sheppard moved away, and the snoring stopped, but Rodney still couldn't sleep. He closed his eyes and tried reciting pi silently, hoping the basic exercise would work to put him out.

He'd finally started to drift, when a small sound from the other side of the bed woke him up again. He turned on his side, trying to figure out what Sheppard was doing to make noise. He was moving slightly, and his breathing was speeding up. He wasn't, was he?

He was. He was jerking off in the same bed as Rodney. The movement that Rodney sensed more than saw was his hand moving under the covers, obviously touching his cock. His eyes were closed as far as Rodney could see, but he was biting his lip as his hand continued to move. "Sheppard!" Rodney hissed, trying to get him to stop.

But Sheppard just rolled his head a little, his hand moving a little faster. "Fuck, Rodney, please," he said, without opening his eyes, and Rodney realized that he'd never woken up; he was doing this in his sleep. Rodney's cock was hard inside his boxers, but there was no way that he was going to touch himself now. Not with Sheppard only a few inches away. Even if Sheppard was apparently jerking off as fast as he could.

Rodney whimpered. Oh, this was more than one man should have to deal with. Finally, after what seemed like an eternity, Sheppard's breath caught and then he sighed, obviously coming. Rodney dug his hands into the sheets, forcing himself to lie still. Sheppard shifted, lying close and warm, and Rodney closed his eyes. It was going to be a very long night.

***

When morning finally came, Rodney was startled awake by the alarm on Sheppard's watch. He didn't know how long he'd lain awake before he'd finally managed to drift off, but from the gritty feeling of his eyes, he'd obviously not gotten anywhere enough sleep. Sheppard muttered something indistinct as his fingers sought out his watch, silencing the alarm.

Rodney watched Sheppard, masochistically waiting for the moment that he realized that he was sharing a bed with someone else. It wasn't long in coming, as Sheppard turned over, one of his hands coming in contact with Rodney's chest. Sheppard froze, eyes still closed. "Uh."

He couldn't even begin to stop the snort. "It was your idea, Colonel." Sheppard sat up and started to answer him, only to turn very green suddenly and bolt from the bed. Retching sounds followed shortly, and Rodney swallowed hard. He'd always had a hard time keeping his stomach when someone was throwing up.

It had nothing to do with nerves. Nothing at all.

Long minutes later, Sheppard stumbled back into the room, looking decidedly worse for wear. Rodney swung his legs out of the bed, deciding that it would be best to meet whatever Sheppard wanted to do about last night on his feet. He wobbled slightly when Sheppard didn't say anything at all, just groping for his pants and pulling them on.

After a moment of watching, Rodney decided that it would be best to just follow his lead, so he yanked his pants on, then looked around and found his jacket and TAC vest. With them in place, he felt much more steady.

Even hung over, Sheppard still dressed with military efficiency and was ready and waiting next to the door by the time Rodney finished lacing his boots. He was silent, watching Rodney with guarded eyes as he checked to make sure he had everything. Without conversation, they left the room, making their way back to the guest hall to meet Ronon and Teyla.

Ronon didn't look much better than Sheppard, and Teyla looked faintly amused by this fact. Of course, she frequently looked amused by Ronon, and Rodney suspected that had a lot to do with the fact that he believed that the two of them were sleeping together, though he'd never ask. Ronon remained slumped over as they come in, but Teyla's gaze sharpened as she looked between Rodney and Sheppard. Rodney felt like putting up his hands and declaring his innocence, but that would violate the unspoken agreement not to talk about it.

They finished up negotiations with the leader of the Hideaki, who looked as hung over as Ronon and Sheppard, then made their way to the jumper to start home. With a success under their belt, the mood should have been good, happy even. Instead, it was almost somber, and Rodney was aware that both Teyla and Ronon were looking concerned. They didn't seem to know what to say, either, though, and so the flight back was made in silence.

After docking in the jumper bay, Ronon immediately got up and left the jumper. He paused right outside the door and looked back at John and Rodney, and then snorted, shaking his head. Teyla was slower to leave, looking at both of them. She gave every appearance of picking her words carefully when she said, "I do not know what is wrong, but I would encourage you both to discuss whatever is bothering you."

Rodney shot a glare at her - it wasn't as if he'd chosen to receive the silent treatment - but the look that she gave him silenced him immediately. It was remarkably similar to the glare that Elizabeth used when she wanted to shut him up, and he briefly wondered which of them had learned it from the other. Gracefully, she rose to her feet and followed Ronon out of the jumper, leaving Sheppard and Rodney sitting next to each other, staring through the windshield.

He had just decided that he'd waited long enough for Sheppard to say something when Sheppard finally did. "I suppose - can we just pretend it never happened?"

Oh, shit. He remembered the night before, and not fondly, apparently. But Rodney was afraid that if they covered it over, it would just fester until it blew up in their faces. He'd had enough of that with Sheppard, thank you very much. "I honestly don't think we can, Colonel."

Just then, Lorne and several marines came in to the bay. As Rodney and Sheppard watched in silence, they started breaking down the supplies in one of the jumpers, checking items off against a list. Rodney bit his lip, wondering what to do. Sheppard reached out and grabbed his arm, saying, "All right. Let's get this over with."

He didn't release the tight grip as he dragged Rodney out of the jumper and over to the transporter. Pushing Rodney into the corner, he pressed the map for a location out on the west pier. Rodney blinked at that, but decided that a neutral location was probably best for what was sure to be an uncomfortable conversation.

He just hoped that when it was over, he still had his friend.

They left the transporter, and without discussing it made their way over to one of the ubiquitous balconies. There they stood, leaning over the railing and staring at the water below in silence. Finally, Rodney couldn't stand it anymore. "I don't know why you're mad. I knew you didn't really want it, that's why I said no. I'd think that you'd be happy that I didn't take you up on your offer last night, and I really think you should just get over whatever heterosexual freak out you're having."

Rodney turned his face, only to see a puzzled expression on Sheppard's face. "What?"

"I'm not mad at you. _You're_ mad at _me_." Sheppard said.

"Me mad at you? Why would I be mad at you?" Rodney asked, blankly. "I mean, don't get me wrong, hauling you around when you're drunk is no picnic, and I'd rather not do that ever again, but it wasn't like you didn't stop or something. My only problem with it was that you _were_ drunk, so I didn't feel right letting you finish what you started. I thought that the only reason you were hitting on me was because you were drunk."

"Wait. So you're not mad that I made a pass at you, but only because you didn't think I _meant_ it?" Sheppard said, sounding startled.

"Well, yes," Rodney said, uncomfortable. Then he realized what the problem was. "Of course, I forgot. Your closed minded military structure hardly opens one's mind does it. Yes, Colonel, I've had sex with men before." Rodney lifted his chin defiantly. If Sheppard didn't like it, he could just deal with it.

Sheppard grabbed him by one shoulder and forcibly turned him around, backing him towards one of the walls. Rodney locked his legs and refused to move any further, closing his eyes and bracing himself for the punch that he knew was coming.

Except that it didn't land. After a moment, he had to know what was going on, so he opened one eye. Sheppard was still there; right in front of him, but his expression was one of... happiness? That made no sense, and the apparent puzzle made Rodney open his other eye and stare. "What? Why are you looking like that?"

"You know, Rodney, for a genius, you can be downright stupid at times," said Sheppard, and then he kissed him. There was no hesitation, no little check of movement that said, "I'm not really as certain as I'm acting." No, this was an assault of teeth and tongue. Rodney opened his mouth to the onslaught, tasting Sheppard back thoroughly.

When the kiss finally ended, Rodney opened eyes he hadn't realized he'd closed. "Oh," he said.

Sheppard grinned widely. "Yeah, oh. Now, do you think we could pick up where we left off last night?"

Hesitantly, still not sure about this whole thing, Rodney nodded. As soon as he did, Sheppard started pushing him back again, and this time Rodney went along with it, letting out a small "oomph" as he hit the wall. Sheppard's hands were busy unfastening his TAC vest, and as soon as it was loose, he was yanking Rodney's jacket open. Obviously not caring that it tangled Rodney's arms up, he shoved up Rodney's t-shirt and immediately bent down to suck one of his nipples into his mouth.

"Christ, I love your nipples," he said when he broke away for a second. "They're always standing up and teasing me. Could just suck on them for hours." Lowering his head again, he seemed ready to make good on his threat, and Rodney moaned in appreciation. Sheppard had a talented tongue, and his nipples were sensitive and the combination was burning rubber straight to his balls. Rodney could feel them pulling up tight, and without thinking he managed to get one hand in Sheppard's hair and pushed him back.

Sheppard honest-to-god _whined_, like a dog being denied his treat, and Rodney nearly relented. But he didn't have any interest in coming in his pants like a horny teenager. "Colonel, stop. Don't want to come that fast."

Giving him a peculiar look, Sheppard said, "Call me John."

Thinking was difficult with all of his blood in his dick, so it took Rodney a moment to catch on. "Um, really? You mean that? Because, uh,"

"No, Rodney, I always insist that the people I'm about to blow call me by my rank. It goes so well with me on my knees, don't you think?"

The thought of Sheppard - John - on his knees short-circuited Rodney's brain, and he couldn't say anything besides, "Uh," for a moment. Then he pushed John back a little further and started to try to untangle his vest and jacket, desperate to get to skin.

Sheppard hesitated for only a second, and then started to strip out of his own clothes. He paused when he got his hands on his t-shirt and stared at the balcony door for a long second. Curious, Rodney turned to look, only to be surprised when the thing turned opaque. "One of these days you're going to tell me everything that you've learned about Atlantis," he said.

"Whatever you want," John said, smiling, "But first I'd really like to come."

Rodney snorted. "Hey, at least you got off last night. I was too busy being virtuous and protecting your honor." John looked blank, and Rodney said, "Oh, come on. You have to have realized that you jerked off last night in your sleep."

John flushed, and said, "No, but I knew something had happened. My boxers were a real mess this morning." Then he gave Rodney a scorching glance. "Now, are we going to keep talking about this or are we going to do something about _that_?" he said, gesturing at where Rodney's cock was tenting the front of his pants.

"Um, yes, please?" Rodney's voice broke on the word please, as John slid to his knees, deft hands unbuckling his belt and pulling his pants down around his thighs, till they caught on his holster.

Rodney didn't care; because John had just sucked his cock into the hottest, wettest place he'd been in, well, ever. There wasn't any hesitation or finesse; just an enthusiastic sucking that took Rodney right to the edge faster than he thought possible. His hands dove into John's hair, and he tried to retain enough focus that he didn't pull it right out of John's head.

John didn't seem to mind, sucking Rodney's cock with slavish devotion. When Rodney's hips bucked, he just took it and sucked even harder, his hands busy with his own belt as he pulled himself free and started to stroke. The sight of John touching himself was the last thing that Rodney needed to push him over the edge, and he gasped out a warning, "Fuck, I'm gonna - "

Instead of letting him go, John took him extra deep, sucked extra hard, and Rodney came with a soft cry. His orgasm caused his knees to buckle, and he slowly slid down the wall, eyes still locked on where John's hand whipped along his cock. The sight kept sending aftershocks through Rodney, and he reached out, eager to touch.

At the first touch of Rodney's hand to his cock, John doubled over like he was in pain, and then came over their hands. Curious, Rodney raised his hand to his mouth and licked some of John's come off his fingers. John's eyes were wide as he watched, and he licked his lips.

No sooner had Rodney pulled his hand away from his mouth than John had dived in to kiss him again. They knelt like that, kissing and kissing and kissing until Rodney's knees screamed and his back ached, and then they kissed some more.

Finally, with an aching sweetness, their lips parted, but for long moments they hung on to each other, till Rodney finally caught his breath. Slowly, he worked his way back up the wall, even as John stared up at him hungrily. "I think that this would be better moved inside," Rodney said.

John grinned and rolled to his feet. Even as Rodney pulled up his pants and looked for his t-shirt, John was bouncing on his heels, looking happier and more relaxed than Rodney thought he'd ever seen him look before. "Yeah, maybe we could take this to your quarters? You have the bigger bed," he said.

Rodney grinned. "Sounds like a plan." He scooped up his vest and went to open the door.

"By the way, I resent you thinking that I was a drunk cock-tease," John said. "I think you should let me fuck you to make up for it."

Fumbling his grip on his vest, Rodney looked over his shoulder at John. "I think that can be arranged."


End file.
